What To Do When You Don’t Know What To Do About Child Behavior Parenting children of any age confronts us with the limitations of our wisdom. There are times when our best efforts positively impact our child’s behavior seem to be futile. Child behavior can catch us off guard us with a form of behavior, like calling us “stupid” in a rude manner, in a public setting. The more emotionally you react to a childbehavior,problem the more that
reaction blocks you from coming up with a positive child discipline solution. There is no universal method or “trick” for leading every child out of a poor child behavior and into a more appropriate mode of self-conduct. Using the popular “time out” method may cause your child’s behavior to worsen rather than to improve. Scolding your child, yelling at your child, complaining to your child about his behavior usually incites even more problematic behavior from the child. We tend to slip into a stressful emotional reaction to conceal our actual ignorance from ourselves, as a sort of ego-defense mechanism. 
One key to solving a child behavior problems is to honestly face and accept your condition of NOT knowing what to do about it. Once you accept that you really do not know what to do to improve the situation, you can then take the necessary steps for finding out what to do. Impatience blocks this process. Out of fear we believe we have to react right away or we will miss the child’s “teachable moment” for improving her behavior. But impatience is one of those stressful reactions that blocks child behavior problem-solving. When you don’t know what to do, do nothing. Try being calmly non-reactive. In a calm state you can think clearly and creatively. You can observe the situation more accurately than when you feel stressed. Remaining calm does not necessarily mean being passive. In a state of calm observation of the situation, calmly consider your goal. Before you can lead a child into a particular form of child behavior, you need to know the behavior that you want. 
Just sharply telling a child, “No” does not necessarily lead that child into appropriate self-conduct. By remaining calmly non-reactive you can access your own higher vision of how you want your child to behave. And from there you can come up with things you can try to lead the child in that direction. Sometimes, by simply remaining calm, the parent exudes a calming influence that restores order to the child’s conduct. So the first thing to do when you don’t know what to do is to face it. Don’t resort to an intense emotional reaction out of exasperation. Remain calm, aware of what is happening, and consider what you want to accomplish with the child. If your child is behaving too wildly in the backseat while you are driving on a busy street, remain calm. Think about the way you would like your child to behave in the back seat. Then open your mind with an attitude of trust that ideas for how to achieve that will arrive.  The parent who reacts emotionally to wild, backseat child behavior very likely explode with annoyance, frustration, and aggression – energies that either incite the child into even more wild aggression or produce a dark and dismal atmosphere of sadness and resentment that no parent wants for her family. 
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