Article by Bob Lancer
(see many more articles at www.boblancer.com) 18 Keys To Successful Parenting 1.Being charge in your relationship with your child begins by being charge of yourself. When your child "makes" you react stressfully, your child is in charge. 2.You are100% responsible for your response to even the most challenging child's behavior. You can learn how to be more effective with less stress if you remain committed to doing so. 3.Make it your top priority to develop the self-control to maintain your peace and poise at all times; when you lose your peace and poise you lose your power. 4.When you lose your patience, you lose more time, because your frustration actually prevents you from soloving your problem. 5.You cannot instill better self-control in a child while you are losing yours. Children become like those they spend time with. 6.To improve your results with a child avoid focusing so much on what the child is doing that you overlook how your actions and reactions contribute to the results that you achieve. 7.By degrees equals ease. Be satisfied with making small steps of improvement in your way of dealing with your child's behavior, and in the improvements you want to achieve in your child's behavior. 8.How you think of a child functions as a self-fulfilling prophesy. Your child is not responsible for how you think of him or her. Your mind and how you use it are your responsibility. Discipline yourself to reject thoughts of your child that you do not want to come true. . Persistently think of your child as a glorious being with limitless potential and you will see that thought materializing. 9.Regard your attitude toward your child as a cause, not as an effect. The attitude that you express toward your influences how your child feels and behaves. 10.Trying to improve a child's behavior by doing nothing more than increasing the harshness of your reaction is like using no other ingredient than salt in your cooking. 11.Even the child who does not seem to listen to you, hears you. You talk your child into behaving the way you tell him that he behaves. 12.There is no such thing as "a difficult child". The child you find difficult to deal with is merely pointing out the areas that you need to develop your knowledge and ability. As you fulfill your higher potential you automatically achieve more satisfying results with any child. 13.Reacting with anger, stress, pleading, arguing, yelling … these represent the most ineffective modes of leading child behavior. Do not regard your child as responsible for the ways you try to lead her. 14.The better you connect, the better you direct. The child needs to feel truly cared about by you to willingly cooperate with you. 15.You will find what you seek. Look for what the child is doing wrong and find that. Look for what the child is doing right and find that. Your emotional state determines your perspective. 16.Allowing yourself to become fatigued guarantees that you slip into negativity. (When you work yourself too hard you push good humor away.) Then you begin relating impatiently with your child, which incites your child's unhappiness and resistance to your directions. 17.Ultimately you have to trust that you can treat yourself well and get away with it, because if you do not treat yourself well you certainlywill not get away with that. 18.What you say and think in anger only reinforces your anger. Nothing has ever defeated anyone other than a belief in his or her own defeat. 
If you found this article helpful, Bob Lancer's full length book, Parenting With Love, Without Anger or Stress will surely be a book you will love. It presents an indepth look into what causes children to behave as they do, and what you can do in a balanced, loving, conscious way to support the fulfillment of your child's healthy, happy, glorious potential. For more information click on cover >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> | 
